An Experience of Light

I call this a dream because it began when I was asleep but  I feel convinced that much of it was a conscious experience.  It took place in the summer of 2009. 

I was asleep in my room when I heard (through sleep) a loud knocking or pounding. I was counting the knocks evidently half asleep and not really aware I was counting because I heard myself say, that's 13.  And as soon as I said it, my entire body was flooded with fear.

It was the fear which woke me up completely.  I'm not sure if I opened my eyes or if I had had them open all along in the dark but I see that the room has somehow filled up with light.  Seeing the light reassures me.  The fear evaporates.

The illumination in the room is white-out bright and the light itself is dense and diffuse at the same time like a spotlight in the dark  - much brighter of course but of that same hazy quality.  The light is so white and so bright that it obscures the contents of the room though not  quite completely.  Underneath the brilliance, I  make out the form of my bedroom - the blaze of the mirror, the shape of the furniture, walls, windows, drapes.

I watch the light for some time, feeling no need to analyze or understand it.  Finally I drift off to sleep.