What Child is this, who laid to rest on Mary’s lap is sleeping? Whom angels greet with anthems sweet while shepherds watch are keeping? This, this is Christ the King Whom shepherds guard and angels sing Haste, haste to bring Him laud, the babe, the son of Mary.
About the Music
About the Light
The light shines in the darkness and the darkness did not overcome it – John 5:1 NRSV-CE
Wishing you and yours a very Merry Christmas <3
As a young single mom I was no stranger to stress. My fast paced job as a registered nurse involved overtime and on-call. And my three small boys were very active.
My health, for the most part was good, but one winter I came down with a case of bronchitis I just couldn't kick. So I turned to mainstream medicine.
Taking the Medical Route
I took round after round of antibiotics, self-administered albuterol nebulizer treatments and began the bronchodilator theophylline which was potentially so toxic it had to be monitored through bloodwork. This would have been fine - if anything I was being told to do had helped. But it really didn't. In fact, every time I began to feel a little better, I'd relapse.
Finally, my doctor suggested prednisone. I was familiar with prednisone and its side effects - and already experiencing significant side effects from the other medication I was taking. So I decided to look into complimentary and alternative modalities.
Complimentary, Alternative and Holistic Wellness
The first thing I learned was the difference between complimentary and alternative wellness. Alternative health care is exactly what it says - an alternative to conventional (or biologically based) medicine. Complimentary (or holistic) measures, on the other hand, work alongside - but do not replace - mainstream medical management.
Once I understood the terminology, I was pleased to learn that many complimentary approaches were well within the scope of standard nursing practice. These included simple comfort measures, environmental changes, and support strategies - like optimal nutrition, hydration, exercise and rest.
I also learned a bit about the history of nursing and was surprised to find a rich tradition of complimentary nursing practices going all the way back to Florence Nightingale, my childhood idol. These practices included some things I'd learned about in school and a few that I had not (such as simple herbal remedies and aromatherapy).
The school I'd attended (Misericordia University in Dallas, PA) had stressed independent nursing practice and a holistic (body, mind and spirit) approach to wellness. So I was very comfortable with the complimentary / holistic measures I was learning about.
A Holistic / Balanced Approach
I did a lot of thinking that winter about what taking a holistic approach to wellness really meant. While I didn't feel that my faith in my doctor was in any way misplaced, I could clearly see that I had been emphasizing body based solutions over the spiritual.
I was very out of balance. I had relied upon traditional medicine completely, ignored the emotional cost of overwork, and drastically underemphasized my Catholic faith. So, with the full cooperation of my doctor, I began my own simple holistic treatment regime.
This regime included daily prayer, attending Mass several times a week, taking garlic honey in the morning, elderberry tea in the evening, rosemary inhalations (which I no longer recommend),* increased fruits and vegetables, a moratorium on overtime, and spending more time out of doors. And, while it didn't happen overnight, I did get better!
Holistic Wellness Meets East and West
That first experience with holistic healing occurred over twenty years ago but, in many ways, it changed my approach to nursing - and life.
I am now a holistic nurse, a student in the Science and Art of Herbalism program, and a member of the American Holistic Nurses Association. As such, I am a big proponent of holistic wellness - but I do have a couple of reservations.
The first reservation is that, as a registered nurse, I believe that moving forward with any treatment approach without involving your physician is always potentially dangerous.
While it is true, that in ancient times people relied completely on herbal and natural remedies, western medicine is not our enemy. Instead it is a vital part of any sound approach to healing and wellness. It is only when we rely upon certain aspects of western medicine exclusively (like pharmaceuticals) that we are likely to become unbalanced - from a holistic perspective.
My second reservation concerns the many new age and eastern practices (such as chakra work or Reiki) that are now associated with holistic health and wellness.
My problem isn't that people who identify as Hindu (or new age for that matter) may be using these modalities - it's that the general population is being told these practices are spiritually neutral or non-religious. This is absolutely not the case.
As a matter of fact, for many people practices like yoga, Reiki and eastern meditation can serve a gateway to deeper involvement in the new age and occult.
My Media
I will be sharing some Catholic friendly holistic wellness resources both here in this blog and on YouTube. This will include some specific wellness strategies - as well an emphasis on our Catholic faith.
Our God is a god of healing. This doesn't mean that we should deliberately test Him by refusing to go to the doctor or omitting commonsense wellness strategies. But it should cause us to have faith in His ability to guide us on the path to restoration and health.
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*Please note: Herbal inhalations done with hot water can burn delicate lung tissue. Essential oil diffusers are now readily available and much safer. Please do NOT directly inhale any kind of steam or vapor from any source - including a diffuser.
For my YouTube channel please visit YouTube.com/c/Barbara Graver
All that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost. From the ashes a fire shall be woken, A light from the shadows shall spring; Renewed shall be blade that was broken, The crownless again shall be king. - J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of The Ring
I'm participating in the NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing) for the first time this year. For those who aren’t familiar, the challenge of NaNoWriMo is to write a complete, 50,000 word novel during the month of November. And I've reached the halfway point and while I am struggling I'm also learning a lot about writing.
I didn't blog much during November or work on my etsy shop and, while I did manage to get to Mass and say the Rosary most mornings, my focus on my home definitely slipped. So, I'm happy to go back to writing at my previous pace.
But the main issue that came up for me during NaNo is the conflict I'm feeling about writing any kind of popular fiction. Before I came back to the Church I had no issues. Now, I sometimes feel that I'm writing things that conflict with my Catholic faith.
This is not to say that Catholic authors can't write genre fiction because, of course, they can. J.R.R. Tolkien managed it. And lots of people in the Catholic Writers Guild seem to be managing it too.
So maybe I'm over complicating it.
I may just need to read more Catholic fiction!
Vision is a German film that chronicles the life of the 12th century Christian mystic St. Hildegard von Bingen. The film begins with her early childhood and covers all of the known major events of her adult life. It is subtitled but moves at a readable pace.
St. Hildegard's Visions
Because angels appeared to St. Hildegard in her visions, she gave a lot of thought to the relationship between angels and man. The saint foresaw an apocalyptic future giving way to a new heaven and a new earth as described in the book of Revelation.
Direct translations of St. Hildegard's visions may be found in Hildegard von Bingen's Mystical Visions which I have not read. But hope to read soon.
St. Hildegard attributed most of her accomplishments (including her incredibly beautiful musical compositions) to her visionary experience. But she remained modest throughout her life, giving all glory and honor to God as shown in the following letter to another religious leader:
A wind blew from a high mountain and, as it passed over ornamented castles and towers, it put into motion a small feather which had no ability of its own to fly but received its movement entirely from the wind. Surely the almighty God arranged this to show what the Divine could achieve through a creature that had no hope of achieving anything by itself. ~ St. Hildegard's letter to Abbot Philip
St. Hildegard and Holistic Wellness
To me, fact that the Physica must be read critically (like all historical medical treatises) doesn't detract from its value. As one of the three female doctors of the Catholic Church, St. Hildegard's medical and visionary writings may be taken seriously.
St. Hildegard's Legacy
The Gospel reading begins at the 15 minute mark and the homily follows. This homily made a big impression on me because I had been struggling to make reading the Bible part of my daily routine.
This was just the encouragement I needed!
Where I'm at with the Bible in a Year Study
Creating a Spiritual Space in My Home
During lockdown I made my living room into a mini chapel.
I set up an altar and started collecting holy statues. Then wall mounted a flatscreen TV (that had gone unused in my bedroom) so I could watch Sunday Mass when it was livestreamed from our local parish.
I am back at Mass now but I still like having the space to say my Rosary and watch some of my favorite Catholic priests on YouTube.
Recently I decided it would ALSO be nice to set up a Bible study space in the same room. This space is just a corner of a room and you do NOT to have a dedicated chapel-room to do it. If space is an issue for you (like it was for me, prior to the last move) you can always set up a space in your room or a shared area. If you use a shared area it may help to create private time by getting up early.
My Bible In a Year Study Corner
You can see my Bible in a Year study corner in the picture above.
The rocking chair once belonged to my maternal grandmother as did the china cabinet. I know a china cabinet doesn't really belong in a living room but I had to move it out of the kitchen anyway to make room for the coal stove and I like the idea of putting my prayer books, Bibles, prayer cards and rosaries behind glass. They are holy items and I think it's nice to put them somewhere special.
In the pictures below you can see my Bible in a Year study tools both in the cabinet and out.
You may notice that my Bible in a Year notebook is spiral bound. It did not come this way! But because I wanted it to lay flat I took it to Staples and had it rebound. The spiral binding and plastic cover (clear in front, navy blue in the back) costs under $5 and to me it's worth it if I'm going to be using a book a lot. ( I'm actually going to be doing the same thing with Fr. Ripperger's prayer book later this week.)
The Our Lovely World book you see in the bottom picture is my favorite book from childhood and one of two I've kept. It is about a crow looking for the creator of the beautiful world that surrounds him. It touched me as a child and I am even more impressed by its message now.
I hope to review the study materials in a future post but will say here that I am very happy with my Great Adventure Bible and Bible in a Year notebook.
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To listen to Fr. Jos. Elston's inspiring homily on lectio divina and the importance of Scripture, please see the following post: Homily on the Importance of Scripture
You can buy the Great Adventure Bible on amazon. The hardcover (affiliate link) pictured above is out of print right now on the editor's website (where I got it) and pricey on amazon but the paper copy is still available on amazon (affiliate link) and the editor's website, as of this writing.
You can buy Fr. Ripperger's Deliverance prayer book on amazon (affiliate link) in both kindle and paperback or from his website.
Pray the Rosary every day in honor of Our Lady of the Rosary to obtain peace in the world . . . for she alone can save it. - Our Lady of Fatima, July 13, 1917
Because October is Rosary month and tomorrow, October 7th, is the feast of Our Lady of the Rosary, I have been focusing on Our Lady of the Rosary in a few different ways. These include learning about the Rosary, saying a 54 Day Rosary Novena and designing a new Rosary pamphlet for my Etsy shop.
A Bit About Our Lady of the Rosary
About the 54 Day Novena
My Rosary Pamphlet
I designed a trifold Rosary pamphlet for Rosary month and listed it in my Etsy printables shop. The pamphlet includes all of the traditional Rosary prayers and has a complete list of the Joyful, Sorrowful, Glorious and Luminous mysteries (listed under the days of the week they are to be recited).
The pamphlet is available for digital download at $1.25 But if you can't afford to purchase the pamphlet for any reason please contact me through Etsy and I'll provide the PDF free of charge.
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You can see my Rosary of the Blessed Virgin Mary Trifold Pamphlet on Etsy at the following link.
You can read more about my decision to pray the 54 Day Rosary Novena here: How I'm Celebrating Rosary Month
See this pamphlet in my shop, Catholic Book And Card! |
The 54 Day Rosary Novena
“Love the Madonna and pray the Rosary, for her Rosary is the weapon against the evils of the world today.” – St. Padre Pio
Why I Love the Rosary
“The Rosary is a remedy for all our evils and the root of all our blessings.” – Pope St. Leo XIII
I love the Rosary because it draws me closer to Jesus and Mary and because the Rosary gives me new insights into the events in the lives of Mary and Jesus (and the Gospel message as a whole). An added benefit is that the Rosary centers me and gives me a degree of peace.
For me, the Rosary is also a wonderful spiritual warfare weapon. Because of my past involvement in the New Age and occult, I've opened a lot of doors and there are times when spiritual warfare is a very real issue for me.
I do not rely upon the Rosary alone. In addition, I go to Mass, receive the Holy Eucharist, make a regular confession, say specific Catholic prayers and have begun to read the Bible everyday with Fr. Mike Schmitz.
Still, the Rosary is a very key piece. And this isn't just me saying so. The effectiveness of the Rosary is well attested to by multiple saints, such as St. Padre Pio, Pope St. Leo XIII and, of course, St. Dominic, as evidenced in the quotes I've included in this post
The Way Things Sometimes Line Up
“The Rosary is a fortress against evil. It is a sign to Satan that you belong to Our Lady.” – St. Dominic
Modern life can be stressful and (like everyone) I have a lot going on. While I'm fine during the day, I sometimes worry at night, more than I sleep, and there are times when I struggle with both my spiritual practice and my faith.
Fortunately, just as these things really began to weigh on me I was reminded of the importance of the Rosary by several seemingly unrelated events.
These events included:
- Watching the movie Fatima
- Gleaning a new perspective on Mary through Fr. Mike's Bible in a Year study
- Coming across the 54 Day Rosary Novena on Hallow
- Walking into church blind and seeing the special statue of Our Lady giving the Rosary to St. Dominic set up for the celebration of Our Lady of the Rosary (this Thursday)
It seemed to me that these events were all pointing toward the Rosary - and suggesting that I make an effort to develop a stronger devotion to Mary. So I'm going to be doing that.
I will be writing more on the Blessed Mother and her Rosary in future posts!
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Info on the 54 Day Rosary Novena on the Hallow website.
For more on my experience with the movie Fatima and the Year in a Day study, please see the following blog post and video: The Movie Fatima and Catholic Bible in a Year Study.
The Annunciation by Leonardo Da Vinci |
And I heard a man’s voice between the banks of the U′lai, and it called, “Gabriel, make this man understand the vision.” So he came near where I stood; and when he came, I was frightened and fell upon my face. But he said to me, “Understand, O son of man, that the vision is for the time of the end.” - Daniel 8:16-17 RSV-CE
Nowhere, however, is St. Gabriel's role as a messenger more important than when he addresses the Blessed mother in Luke 1:26-38:
In the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent from God to a city of Galilee named Nazareth, to a virgin betrothed to a man whose name was Joseph, of the house of David; and the virgin’s name was Mary. And he came to her and said, “Hail, full of grace, the Lord is with you!” But she was greatly troubled at the saying, and considered in her mind what sort of greeting this might be. And the angel said to her, “Do not be afraid, Mary, for you have found favor with God. And behold, you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus.He will be great, and will be called the Son of the Most High; and the Lord God will give to him the throne of his father David, and he will reign over the house of Jacob for ever; and of his kingdom there will be no end.”...And Mary said, “Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word.” And the angel departed from her.-Luke 1:26-33, 38 - Revised Standard Version - Catholic Edition
Why I'm Doing a Catholic Study Program
The 3 Main Areas I Decided to Study
- Sacred Scripture / Bible study (Old Testament and New)
- Sacred Tradition (as found in the teachings and history of the Catholic Church)
- Understanding why so many things non-Catholics say about the Church are inaccurate.
Catholic Study: Apologetics
Apologetics Resources
- The Case for Catholicism by Trent Horn
- The Catholic Answers 20 Answers Series - The Church + many others in the series
- Beginning Apologetics 1: How to Explain and Defend the Catholic Faith by Frank Chacon
- A Pocket Guide to Catholic Apologetics by Patrick Madrid
- The Council of Trent YouTube channel and podcast. FREE
- Catholic Answers YouTube channel and podcast. FREE
Catholic Study: Sacred Scripture
Sacred Scripture Resources*
- The Douay Rheims Bible (Free Online)
- The Revised Standard Version Catholic Edition (St. Ignatius Large Print Edition) (FREE RSV-CE)
- The Ignatius Study Bible (New Testament)
- Does the Bible Really Say That? by Patrick Madrid
- Where is That in the Bible? by Patrick Madrid
- Truth & Life Dramatized Audio Bible (New Testament)
- The Bible in a Year (with Fr. Mike Schmitz) - podcast and YouTube** FREE
Catholic Study: Sacred Tradition
Sacred Tradition / Catholic Teachings
- The Catechism of the Catholic Church (FREE online version - you may have to turn off your adblock to use the online flip book)
- The Fathers Know Best: Your Essential Guide to the Teachings of the Early Church by Jimmy Aikin
- Why is That in Tradition? by Patrick Madrid
- Scripture and Tradition - Catholic Answers, 20 Answer series
- The Baltimore Catechism (FREE online) This is an older Catechism and not as long as our modern version. I'm not sure when I'll actually get to this one but wanted to include it because of the free study (below).
- Baltimore Catechism Course (FREE online)
My Goals
I wanted to share a passage from my favorite single chapter in the entire Bible. Isaiah 54.
While I know that this passage is really about Israel, it has always spoken straight to my heart. To me, it is a promise God makes to each of us.
The Catholic Bible in a Year Study
The Recommended Catholic Bible
A Word About Timing
This is my herb garden circa 2015. Yes it is modest and right now it is a mess. But I wanted to share this image AND a commitment to share more pics when it is as I imagine it will be later this summer.
Writing My Testimony
June 2022 update: I have been waffling about writing my testimony for a long time. Odds are, I was praying about it around the time I had this dream. But I didn't see the connection until now.
The Dream
A contractor I apparently knew had told me about a volunteer opportunity. He said that there was a woman living in a house that was in bad condition and that he, and some others, had been trying to help her. So I went to see what I could do.
The house was unpleasant. Not deplorable necessarily but ugly. I was in the kitchen and the young woman I was supposed to help was complaining. There were numerous problems with the property. I remember that there was a 1980s style drop ceiling and some of the tiles were coming down. Everything seemed flimsy and cheap.
I didn't enjoy talking to the woman. She was loud and obviously immature. She was younger than me. I didn't have a strong sense of her age but she acted like an adolescent or even a pre-adolescent. I tried to be charitable but I found her very irritating. It seemed that she was renting and she was very unhappy with her landlady who was neglecting the property.
A little while later, I was at a dinner being held in the woman's honor. We were seated at a long table under an old aluminum carport next to the house. I was at the far end of the table. I had reconnected with an old friend. In real life, our friendship ended years ago but I've regretted that. In the dream, I was happy to reconnect with her and eager to catch up. She looked young and successful, just as I remembered her.
Annoyingly, the guest of honor kept demanding my attention from her end of the table. She had written several different documents and was insisting I read them aloud. Someone brought them to me. It was a hodgepodge of old newspaper clippings and pictures and handwritten papers.
I did not want to be bothered with the woman or her requests and kept saying that I didn't want to read what she had written. I was angry with her for interrupting and insisting I read. I felt that she was demanding attention she didn't deserve even though the dinner was being held in her honor.
My Take
When I woke up, I was still a little annoyed. But then it occurred to me that the immature, attention seeking woman might be that part of myself who I don't want to acknowledge - here in this blog or anywhere. My feelings toward her are so negative that blogging about the dream is unpleasant.
But there is something about all of this that is demanding my attention.
I don't think it was any coincidence that I felt so much negativity toward the woman in the dream. Other people apparently realized she needed help but, to me, she didn't deserve it. I wanted to be left alone with my successful friend instead.
Whether the dream was a message from God or a message from my subconscious is debatable. But I do feel that it's significant.
Looking at the Symbolism
- The charitable contractor > charitable carpenter > Divine influence?
- Young woman > my inner self, my authentic self
- House the young woman lived in > her self, her reality, my inner reality
- Cheap, run down and flimsy state of the house > disregard for self, ignoring self, neglect
- Woman mentioned as being part owner of house > my executive functioning self
- My successful friend > what I aspire to but feel I can never be > feeling inferior, different
- The dinner in honor of the young woman > the idea that others may care
- My very irritated attitude toward the young woman > disliking and disregarding who I really am
- Wanting the young woman to leave me alone > ignoring my problems
- The material she wanted me to read > her story > my history
Mary Saying Yes to God |
And in the sixth month, the angel Gabriel was sent from God into a city of Galilee, called Nazareth, To a virgin espoused to a man whose name was Joseph, of the house of David; and the virgin's name was Mary. And the angel being come in, said unto her: Hail, full of grace, the Lord is with thee: blessed art thou among women. Who having heard, was troubled at his saying, and thought with herself what manner of salutation this should be. And the angel said to her: Fear not, Mary, for thou hast found grace with God.Behold thou shalt conceive in thy womb, and shalt bring forth a son; and thou shalt call his name Jesus. [32] He shall be great, and shall be called the Son of the most High; and the Lord God shall give unto him the throne of David his father; and he shall reign in the house of Jacob for ever. And of his kingdom there shall be no end. And Mary said to the angel: How shall this be done, because I know not man? And the angel answering, said to her: The Holy Ghost shall come upon thee, and the power of the most High shall overshadow thee. And therefore also the Holy which shall be born of thee shall be called the Son of God.And behold thy cousin Elizabeth, she also hath conceived a son in her old age; and this is the sixth month with her that is called barren: Because no word shall be impossible with God. And Mary said: Behold the handmaid of the Lord; be it done to me according to thy word. And the angel departed from her.- Luke 1: 26-38 (Douay Rheims Bible)
You can listen to the SSPX (Society of St. Pius the X) Consecration (of Russia) Prayer as spoken by Bishop Fellay below at 44:19:
Things have been going well for me lately.
I feel good about my Etsy shop. Most days, I even feel good about my writing. But I've been wondering lately if continuing with the new age to Catholic content really makes sense. Sometimes I think that it's a waste of time.
I feel discouraged and I'm not sure if that's fatigue, spiritual warfare or just plain common sense. So I prayed for guidance. And then I came across a bible.
Finding the Bible
The Bible was exactly what I'd been looking for ever since I returned to the faith.
It was white, just like the Bible my grandmother had given me when I was young, and it had amazing illustrations and very readable type. There was a section on the Rosary and another on the Stations of the Cross - both complete with pictures. And it was the exact version I'd been looking for.I liked that it was published in 1962 and still in its original box.
So I bought it on the spot.
Reading My New Bible
One thing I do know, that whereas I was blind, now I see. - St. John 10:25
When I was in the new age I was spiritually blind. And when I returned to the faith, things were suddenly crystal clear. So this verse says it all. It reminded me of how important it is to keep talking about the deception of the new age and occult.
So I decided that for now I am going to hang in there with the blog and continue with my testimony.
Probably the best reason to read the Bible is that it increases our understanding of our Catholic faith. But there are many other reasons. Receiving personal guidance is one. Combatting the lies of the enemy is another.
Both of which were huge for me this week.
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